CFFL Playoffs and Fantasy Bowl Preview

Merry Christmas!

Well we are all set.  The big Fantasy Bowl XXXIV match up between the Chislers and Cocktails has come to reality.  Could this be an epic shoot out, or a complete blow out?  Let's look to see how they got there last week...

Chislers 41  Animals 26 - CHICAGO, IL - It was another battle between father and son in the playoffs, a place the Animals were able to defeat the Chislers last year on their way to a Fantasy Bowl title.  This year it would be different.  With no Happy or Sad Cam and facing the number one offense Chislers it was going to a tall task.  The Animals took a quick lead 18-0 but barley any of the Chisler main players had yet to play. 

Woods was a late line up change that paid off!!

But as the 4:00 games began, the Rams/Chislers were taking the field, however less one of the best players in the league, Todd Gurley.  Well it appeared they wouldn't need Gurley, as both Goff and Woods would actually run TDs in!  Then it hit!  Goff hit Woods for an 11 point play and Antonio Brown caught a TD just seconds apart.  It was all over for the Animals as their dreams for a repeat ended.  The Chislers were yet again back into the Fantasy Bowl for the 11th time in franchise history.

Cocktails 37  Krauts 32 - BERLIN - There is something about teams from Germany fighting teams from Russia that just doesn't end well for the Germans.  The Cocktails had beaten the Krauts twice in the regular season and was looking for yet a third to move on to their first ever Fantasy Bowl.

Mahomes had 14 points!

The Stage would be set by a colossal disastrous line up change by the Krauts.  The Krauts struck first as Kyle Rudolph "the red nose reindeer" scored two TDs including a Hail Mary TD catch at end of the half.  The big mistake was that the Krauts, for some reason, decided to bench Cousins for Trubisky!  Wait, what?  Was it because Cousins had played terrible last week? (No he threw for 2 TDs).  Was it because "Bitch" Trubisky was lighting it up lately?  (Not really, 4 points and 8 points last 2 weeks).  Well that move would come back to haunt the Krauts.


Trailing 32-6 going into Sunday Night, the Cocktails would need a decent game from the Chiefs who was playing a tough game up in Seattle in the cold, dark night.  It was really only a matter of time, as Mahomes continued his MVP year with 14 points along with 11 from Butker.  The  final seconds of the Krauts season ticked off the clock and the final was 37-32 for the Cocktails.

Cousins was perplexed about the decision. 

Trubisky had one TD pass.  Cousins had 3.  Those two extra TDs that Cousins, who led this team the entire year and played for the owner's favorite team the Vikings, threw, would have won the game for the Krauts!

Fantasy Bowl XXXIV Preview

Molotov Cocktails at Cherry's Checkers

Well this was the match up the entire league was expecting after they both stocked up on Ram and Chief players.  And with both NFL teams needing to win this weekend, they might not have any players sitting. 

QB - Mahomes vs Goff.  We saw this actual match up in the NFL and it was one hell of a shoot out.  Chiefs take on Raiders while the Rams take on 49ers.  Both will be at home.  This is going to be close.  I see Mahomes edging Goff here by one score.
ADV - Cocktails

RB - Some Chief RB vs. Chubb (Gurley?).  Williams seems to be the play here, even if he has West on the bench.  Chubb has been a pleasant surprise and has 10 TDs on the season.  However Browns play the Ravens.  Gurley may not play Sunday due to nursing a banged up knee.  If he does play, count on the advantage going to the Chislers.  However I have a feeling he won't be playing.
ADV - Cocktails

WR - Chiefs WRs vs. Brown, Hilton, Thielen and Woods.  While the Cocktails are banking on the Chiefs WRs and TE Kelce, the Chislers will be hoping to get some other production from Hilton and Thielen.  Hard to argue that the Cocktails wide outs won't out score the Chislers.  Hill and Kelce alone will be enough as each TD catch is 11 points. 
ADV - Cocktails

K - Butker vs. Zuerlein.  Well it depends on what the Chiefs and Rams do.  Either way, I could see Zuerlein getting more FGs than Butker (which would mean Cocktails probably getting more TDs)
ADV - Chislers

This should be a good one and will be a wild Sunday afternoon as both Chiefs and Rams play at 4:00.  Oh boy!  I don't know if the Chislers are going to be able to keep up with the scoring that the Cocktails will likely put up.  But you know there is one thing the Chislers have that no other team has.  Chisler Luck!  The Chislers are going to need to be at least 6 point behind by the end of the 4:00 madness so that Hilton can catch a game winning TD for the Chislers to get them their 6th Fantasy Bowl title. 

Prediction:  Cocktails prevail however as they will have an 8 point lead, and Hilton will only get 1 TD.  Cocktails win 52-50.

CFHL Week 2

As we move onto Week 2 we have a lot of parity in the league with only one undefeated team at 2-0 and one 0-2 team, with the rest at 1-1.

La Femme Nikita 4 Assassins 2 
Nikita are the only undefeated team beating the Assassins.  Their Lighting combo of Stamkos and Kucherov combined for 6 goals, 7 assists, +6, and 2 PPPs.  Howard and Hutton goalies for the Assassins came up with no wins.

Goon Crew 4  Krampus Carols 2
It was a goalie battle  as both  teams had 4 wins each.  Krampus goalie Halak had 3 wins and Goon Crew goalie Andersen had 3 wins as well.  The undoing of the Krampus was that they managed only 3 goals the entire week.

Mayhem on Ice 4  AshBusters 2
The defending Cherry Cup champs got their first win of the season dispensing the AshBusters.  Atkinson was the Number One Star of the game getting 4 goals and a +6. 

White Mambas 5  Checkers 2
The once dominating Checkers are now 0-2 as they got beat by the White Mambas.  Marchand led the Mambas with 2 goals and 6 assists along with 4 PPPs.  Checkers made the Mambas feel it though racking up 57 hits.  William Carrier had 23 hits for the Checkers

USSR 5  Who Gives a Puck 2
The USSR are back on the winning track taking down the Puck.  It was low scoring with USSR edging the Puck 6-5 in goals and by one hit.  MacKinnon for the USSR had  3 assists and 6 hits.

CFFL Three Stars of the Week:

Sergei Bobrovsky, G, White Mambas, 4 wins, .970% SV%

Morgan Rielly, D, Assassins, 3 goals, 6 assists, +10, 2 PPP and 3 hits

Nikita Kucherov, F, La Femme Nikita, 2 goals, 7 assists +7, 1 PPP and 1 hit.

Goon of the Week:  William Carrier, Checkers, 23 hits.

CFFL Playoffs 2018

Was a bit of a ho-hum first round of the playoffs with really no thrilling games.  About the only game that got somewhat interesting was the Ferrets vs. Krauts game and that was still a 13 point difference. 

Chislers 29  Sinistars 14 - CHICAGO, IL - Well Chisler luck once again prevailed.  This was a week where the Chislers were primed for an upset scoring well below their average and Goff throwing for zero TDs.  But the Sinistars couldn't take advantage of it, as their traditionally power running attack was held to 0 points (Ingram and Peterson).  The Chislers did still manage 23 points from their Rams (Gurley 12 and Zuerlein 11).  They now move on to face their division foe and son, Alex's Animals.

Gurley scored twice despite having knee issues

Krauts 48  Ferrets 35 - BERLIN - The Ferrets did what they could to try to come back from the early 20-0 hole Kraut WR Mike Williams put them in on Thursday night.  It just wasn't enough as Joe Mixon ran two scores in and Kirk Cousins had 2 TD passes.  As with the Sinistars, the Ferrets were let down (really all year) by their duo RBs Elliott and Johnson, who managed only one TD between the two of them.  Krauts will face their division foe Cocktails who swept them this year.

Williams' 20 points really sealed the win

Animals 35  Crush 8 - PASADENA, CA - The Crush completely came out flat in their home playoff game scoring only 8 points with players like Brady, Keenan Allen, Michael Thomas, Ebron, Gronkowski.  How is that possible?  (Sounds like another Southern CA team that played like crap at home...)  The defending champ Animals however were ready!  Kicker Fairbairn had 17 points and Hopkins snared two TDs as the Animals move on to face the Chislers who they knocked out in last years playoffs on their way to their first Fantasy Bowl title. 

Fairbairn was 5-5 in FG attempts!

Cocktails 32 Titans 19 - TOLEDO, OH - The Glass Bowl was packed.  Standing room only to see their Titans in the playoffs for the second year in a row.  But also to see the high powered Cocktails.  While they have been slowed down some, the Cocktails are still rolling as they shot out to an early 30-0 lead after Thursday with their Chiefs.  Including 12 points from back up to the back up RB Damien Williams!  They move on to try to beat the Krauts for a third time this year!

Back up to the back up!

2nd Round Playoff Preview:

Animals at Chislers (-14)

The Defending Champs are on their quest for back to back titles and will have to defeat the Chislers to make it to their second consecutive Fantasy Bowl.  These two teams split the regular season contests.  Chislers won in Week 1 41-22 while the Animals won in Week 14 15-12.  Last year in the first round of the playoffs the Animals won in thrilling fashion as Mike Evans caught a last minute TD for the victory 46-44.

Can Goff lead the Chislers to the Fantasy Bowl

This year both teams come in banged up.  Cam Newton has a bad shoulder (apparently) and Gurley has a banged up knee.  Chislers have been slowed down as the Rams have looked terrible lately.  A trip to Arizona might just cure them.  Chislers may need to rely on Goff's arm and Zuerlein's leg to win this one.  Of course its a Happy Cam or Sad Cam that decides the fate of the Animals...or does it.  Look out for their WR trio of Evans, Hopkins and Hooper.  Fairbairn can go foot to foot with Zuerlein.

Chislers just have too much talent to not win this one.  But not by 14. Chislers 40-32  Bet:  Animals +14

Cocktails at Krauts (+12)

They say its hard to beat a team three times in one year.  Cocktails were victorious in the home and home weeks vs. the Krauts 49-13 and 36-25.   They will attempt a third victory against a fired up Krauts team.  It will be a challenge for the Cocktails who will start 6 Chiefs who play on the road, at night, in Seattle.  Can they produce enough points to pull this game out and make it to their first ever Fantasy Bowl?  It is going to be interesting and will not be determined until late Sunday night.

Mahomes ready to defeat the Krauts for a third time

The Krauts can score at any position with Fournette and Mixon in the backfield (puching people and getting in fights) and Gordon, Mike Williams, and Kyle Rudolph at wide out.  I wouldn't say his players have very favorable match ups either.  Mixon going against a tough Brown D, Vikings (Rudolph and Cousins) at Detroit.  Williams playing Ravens. 

This one will be decided in the final moments of the game.  If I was the Krauts I would want to score 40 points or more to have a chance before the Chiefs kick off Sunday night.  Cocktails 34-29.  Bet Krauts +12. (of course what do I know? I went 1-3 last week)

CFHL Week 1

Well the puck has dropped on another CFHL Season.  This season is a short one and every game will be oh so important!

AshBusters 6  Checkers 1
AshBusters had little trouble defeating the Checkers this week and dominated 6 of the 7 categories, including a 29-9 advantage in assists!  Scheifele for the AshBusters was clearly the player of the game netting 5 goals, 6 assists, +3, 3 PPP and 3 hits.  Both of their goalies each had 2 wins as well.  Checkers will have some work to do and not as much time to do it in.

Scheifele has big week for AshBusters

Krampus Carols 5  White Mambas 1
In another blow out the Krampus dominated as well.  Krampus Captain Ovechkin led all players with 7 goals.  Neither net minder was very impressive as each team could only manage 1 win each out of their respective goalies (Anderson and Halak for Krampus and Quick and Bobrovsky for Mambas).

Assassins 6  Mayhem on Ice 1
It was a week of lopsided wins as the Defending Cup Champs Mayhem on Ice lost to the Assassins, who some think might have had the best draft of the league.  They had an impressive number of assists (37) led by Wheelers' 7 assists. 

Wheeler had 7 big assists for Assassins

Who Gives a Puck 5  Goon Crew 2
Another lopsided game, was closer than the score indicated, sort of.  The difference was really the goalies.  Puck certainly had the better goal tenders in this game as they had 3 wins from Dubnyk and Varlamov to go along with a SV% of .925.

Dubnyk stoned his opponents 

La Femme Nikita 4  USSR 3
Hey a close game!  And it was a close one for sure.  Not only was it a one category win, They were only separated by one in both Goals and Hits.  MacKinnon had 6 assists for the USSR while Stamkos managed 4 goals for Nikita. 

Three Stars of the Week:  

Number 1 Star:  Alex Ovechkin, Krampus, 7g, 0a, +5, 1 PPP, 7 hits

Number 2 Star: Mark Scheifele, AshBusters, 5g, 6a, +3, 3 PPP and 3 hits

Number 3 Star:  Jack Eichel, Assassins, 5g 4a, +4, 3 PPP and 3 hits

Goon of the Week:  Adam Larsson, D, Goon Crew, 12 hits

CFFL Week 14 and Playoff Preview!

What a wild ending to the 2018 CFFL season for some teams.  Dragons....what the hell happened?  Crush and Ferrets...make my preseason prediction a reality...Cocktails just couldn't over throw the Krauts yet again...

Key Games from Week 14:

The South had the most drama of any division to end the season.  The Dragons had been sitting at the top of the division for the entire season, literally.  Since Week 1! Only to find themselves at home in December. 

Titans 29  Dragons 19 - Just win Dragons.  Just win and you are in.  Easier said than done when you your starting RBs are Peyton Barber "Distant cousin of Tiki and Ronde" and Tevin Coleman.  Philip Rivers had a disappointing day throwing for only 1 score as well.  That would spell doom as the Titans roared back in the second half with 2 TDs from "Aunt" JuJu!  The win, amazingly enough would propel the Titans into the playoffs as the Division winner of the South as the game below unfolded.

Aunt JuJu came up big for the Titans!

Mayhem 49  Killer Bees 31 - Things were looking pretty bleak for the Mayhem after the Killer Bees took an early 31-13 lead not to mention the Mayhem had left 24 points on the bench from Derrick Henry!  Yes 24 points!  This game would have been over before the 4:00 games even kicked off if that was the case... But be that as it may the Mayhem had to look else where for the points.  They looked no further than Dallas.  Where Dak Prescott and Amari "Former Stiff" Cooper connected for not one, not two, but three 10 point connections giving the Mayhem the victory after all was lost.  Their win knocked out the Killer Bees and put the Titans into the playoffs.  Mayhem was certainly everywhere.

You are looking at 30 points!

In the East the Cocktails were looking for their first Eastern Bloc Division title and had been neck and neck with the Krauts all season, despite having a much superior offense.  But it all came down to the final game of the season....

Roulette 42  Cocktails 35 - The Cocktails certainly have seemed to slow down somewhat as their high flying Chief offense has fell on some difficult times.  First with the cutting of Hunt and then Hill's tweaked ankle.  I mean if slowed down means scoring 35 total points...But that was enough slowing down for the Roulette who took advantage of the situation.  They still needed to get scores out of almost every player, including 12 from Carson Wentz.  It was enough to defeat the Cocktails, but not enough at the time to prevent them from winning the East.  The Krauts still needed to win and it wasn't looking good for those crazy Germans...

Wentz threw for 12 points in his final game of the season

Krauts 18  Juggernauts 16 - In a low scoring defensive battle the Kruats appeared to be on their way to a loss giving the Cocktails their first division crown.  It was reported the Cocktails had the champagne already on ice before the game was even over.  A little premature maybe?  The Kraut / Bear Defense would get a safety that would prove to be the difference.  With the game 16-14 in favor of the Juggs time was running out.  Only a minute was left in the game.  The corks were ready to pop for the Cocktails...until...suddenly Kraut QB Kirk Cousins tossed a TD pass for the victory 18-16 giving the Kruats their 7th division crown 4th out of the last 5 years. 

Cousins tosses the game winning TD!

And in the Wild Wild West the Crush roared back into the thick of things with 3 straight wins to end the season, but the last one would not be easy.  This while the Sinistars saw their division title slip through the fingers of their QB Russell Wilson, who failed in the final game. 

Crush 45  Killers 39 - This game was a shoot out with the Killers team finally hitting on all cylinders.  It only took them 14 weeks to figure that out as three players put up double digits, Brees (10), Julio Jones (12), and kicker Hauschka (11).  It wouldn't be enough though as the "Good ole Tom" Brady's 12 points led the team to victory.

Good ole Tom

Bums 28  Sinistars 23 - Just win Sinistars.  Just win!  Well team leader and 2017 CFFL Player of the Year Russell Wilson was set to show the world why he should be the 2018 league MVP once again by bringing the Sinistars from behind to win the division.  Down 28-22 late in the game, just 2 TD passes from Wilson would seal the victory.  Wilson scored 1 point.  ONE point!  Not gonna do it son. 

Wilson had a rough day

Don't worry, nothing mattered in the North.  Chislers and Animals had playoffs locked up and the Ferrets had little trouble defeating a Crew team that had completely given up on their coach and owner...

Playoffs - Round 1

Well here we go!  Onto the playoffs (what is that like anyway???)  Will it be the Cocktails and the Chislers in the Fantasy Bowl?  Or will it be the Ferrets and Crush as predicted in preseason?

Sinistars at Chislers (-13)
The 7-7 Sinistars travel to Chicago to take on the 12-2 Chislers.  The Chislers bring their Ram attack offense that lately hasn't been as potent as it was earlier.  The Rams take on the Eagles Sunday night so this game will be determined late.  The Sinistars are no easy out for the Chislers.  Earlier in the year they continuously posted multiple players with 12 points.  However with the injury to Conner they have taken a step back.  Look for the Rams/Chislers offense to get it back into high gear and win.  But it will be closer than you think.

Chislers will be looking for a lot of these two guys

By the way..Chislers 25th playoff appearance.  Since 1998 only missed the  playoffs twice.  Makes me sick.  This leagues Patriots.

Bet: Sinistars +13

Ferrets at Krauts (-7)
The 8-6 Ferrets make the long trip to Berlin to take on the 11-3 Krauts in a Fantasy Bowl XXIII rematch.  Krauts defeated the Ferrets 38-28 in that game.  This will be a tough one for both teams as they wonder which version of their QB will show up.  Ferrets will have "Home" Ben and Krauts will have Cousins at home as well.  RBs are pretty even too with a slight edge maybe to the Krauts.  Ferrets have been somewhat disappointed by their duo of Elliott and Johnson, while the Krauts have been pleasantly surprised with Fournette and Mixon. 

Ferreets hope for Home Ben

Gonna be a close one.  Going to go out on a limb here and say the Ferrets win outright.

Bet: Ferrets +7

Animals at Crush (-2)
The defending champ Animals at 10-4 travel west to sunny southern California to take on the red hot 7-7 Crush.  Its going to depend on if it will be a Happy Cam or a Sad Cam this week.  Cam Newton takes on the Saints but at home...could be a Happy Cam Day.  That game is Monday night with the Crush having Michael Thomas that night.  Could very well come down to the final game of the week.  The Animals better be tied or only behind slightly to make sure they have the chance to sustain a Thomas TD.

Thomas plans on flexing his muscles Monday Night

Another close one that should come down to MNF.  Unfortunately for the Animals their quest for back to back championships ends here.

Bet: Crush -2

Cocktails at Titans (+13)
The 10-4 mighty Cocktails will travel to Northwest Ohio to take on the 7-7 Toledo Titans in the Glass Bowl.  This game could be over before the weekend with the Chiefs playing Thursday night.  They are at home facing the Chargers.  It appears the Cocktails will go all in on the Chiefs and try to end this game early going with 6 Chiefs in their starting lineup including Mahomes, Kelce, Ware and Hill if he is good to go.  The Titans will need a huge game from Watson to make this even a game.

Cocktails = Chiefs, Chiefs = Cocktails

Not even close.  Cocktails roll as the Titans don't have the offense to keep up.

Bet: Cocktails -13

RIP George H.W. Bush