CFHL Week 13

Here is the action from Week 13 in the Cherry Fantasy Hockey League:

Goon Crew vs. Who Gives a Puck 4-2
In a game that the Puck finally get some good net minding play, they end up facing the Crew who have one of the best goaltender duos in the league.  The Puck ended up with 4 wins and a SV% of .940.  A solid week and good for 2 wins typically.  However the Crew raised him 2 wins to 6 and ended up with a SV% of .971.  Crawford had 2 wins and Varlamov had 4 for the Crew!  However the Crew will be without Varlamov for at least two games next week as he handles a civil lawsuit filed by his ex girlfriend.  Bitches be crazy...

USSR vs. Mayhem On Ice 3-3
The Soviets and the Mayhem skated to a split this week.  Dion Phaneuf for the Mayhem led all players with 11 PIM, which is pretty typical.  However as we all know its nice when Phaneuf is mentioned in the news letter...USSR had only one player to score more than one goal, Hoffman had 2 goals.  That was the total of the goals scored by the entire Mayhem team this week!  The Red Army got a nice number of wins from their goalies Schneider and Anderson, 5.  Bitches be hot...

Assassins vs. Checkers 4-2
The Assassins finally get on the winning side of a matchup after falling to last place in the league.  Malkin and Ryan did what they could to help their team with 4 and 3 goals respectively, including a hat trick by Malkin.  However the Assassins would dominate in most other categories.  Their Number One Star was the mouth breather Pavelski who had 2 goals, 3 assists a +4 for the Assassins.  And as goes the Kings goes the Checkers as their Kings players combined for a -7. Bitches be fetching hats..

Krampus Carols vs. AshBusters 4-2
Going into this week, the Krampus Carols and the AshBusters were tied for the Smythe Division lead both with 78 points.  This was for the lead in the division.  The Krampus would come out on top remaining the top team in the division.  Pairs of goals from Crosby, Hall, Perry, and Kucherov didn't hurt for the Krampus.  To go along with his pair of goals, Hall had 4 assists to match team captain Karlsson 4 assist.  Ekman-Larsson for the AshBusters earned Goon of the Game with 12 PIM. Bitches be random...

CFHL Week 12

Close games this  week in the CFHL and a Sunday that saw leads change...

Goon Crew vs. USSR 3-2-1
This was one of the games that saw a Sunday change in the score.  The USSR certainly had the Crew on the ropes most of the week, specially that the 3 top players for the Crew from the Stars were only playing 2 times this week.  The Soviets had no problem winning goals thanks in large part to Kane's hat trick to start out the week and a total of 4 goals.  The game was tied in +/- at 0 and USSR had lead in goalie wins.  On Sunday The Crew would get a +4 and Crawford would get his 3rd win to tie goalie wins, giving the Crew the win.

Crawford big part of the Crew victory

AshBusters vs. Who Gives a Puck 4-2
AshBusters continue to roll and have caught the Krampus Carols for first place in the Smythe.  Their win comes at the expense of the defending champs Who Gives a Puck.  The AshBusters racked up the assists getting 3 assists from 5 different skaters. (Thornton, Panarin, Ekman-Larsson, "Cousin" Keith, and Eberle).  Tyler Meyers for the Puck was the Goon of the Game getting 17 minutes in penalties.  Holtby in net for the AshBusters continues to shine getting 2 more wins this week as the Puck' goalie play continues to struggle.  This week no wins and a .851, including a pitiful .722 from Goalie Ramo from the Flames. 

Holtby having fun with his water...

Mayhem on Ice vs. Assassins 3-2-1

Did someone mention Toews?

The Assassins just haven't been able to get things going this year and drop another week, this time to the Mayhem on Ice.  Goals were a premium this week between these two teams as they both tied at only 6 goals each.  Toews led all skaters with 3 goals to go along with his assist and +3.  Kuznetsov for the Assassins was their best player netting 2 goals, 4 assists and +4 on the week.  Mayhem got 3 wins, 2 form Lundqvist and both Henrick and Mrazek had .950 in SV%.  The Mayhem are now only 3 points behind the Smythe leading Krampus Carols and AshBusters as that division gets tight. 

Checkers vs. Krampus Carols 3-2-1
This game swung back and forth several times, only to have the Checkers ultimately on top by the end of the week.  It started out with the Checkers dominating early in the week with a Kings Monday getting 2 goals, 8 assists and a +3....yes that's 8 assists.  The Krampus Carols would come back however and hold a 5-1 lead going into Sunday, including 2 goals from Sidney Crosby.  But once again it was the Kings late that gave the Checkers the win for the week as they scored 2 more goals, 3 assists and a +6 to win goals and +/-, plus Quick got the win in net tying Wins. 

Checker Ice Girls

CFHL Week 11

Just as last week saw blow outs, the teams that were on the winning side of the blow outs got blown out this week...

Mayhem on Ice vs. Goon Crew 5-1
Last week the Goon Crew rolled to a 5-1 victory.  This week the shoe was on the other foot.  The Crew didn't get their usual production from their Stars trio of Spezza, Benn, and Seguin.  They only combined for 2 goals and 3 assists and a brutal -7 combined.  Mayhem center Toews earned Number One Star of the game with 3 goals, 3 assists, a +6 and 6 PIM, a very busy week indeed.  In addition Tyson Barrie had an impressive week for a defenseman scoring 3 goals and 3 assist for the Mayhem.  The Crew continue be strong in net getting 6 wins, 3 wins each from Varlamov and Crawford. 

Toews gonna show her his "O" face... you know what I'm talking about
Ohhh, Ohhhh....

USSR vs. Checkers 5-1
With a chance to gain on the Norris leading Crew, the Checkers did not take advantage of the situation at all and fell to the Soviets.  Neither team got a lot of production out of their players.  Checkers didn't have a single player score more than 1 goal or 2 assists.  Kane had 2 goals and 3 assists while "Stinky" Stamkos had 2 goals and a +4 for the USSR.  Quick for the Checkers after a 4 win week last week could only manage one win. 

Who Gives a Puck vs. Krampus Carols 3-3
This game ended in a tie with the Krampus Carols flexing their offensive power scoring 11 goals and 11 assists.  Matt Duchene lead all players with 4 goals while Karlsson had 4 assists.  Where they failed was their line of Crosby, Hall and Perry who combined for a pitiful -10.  Luongo for the Puck was their only goalie and surprisingly he was enough to beat the Krampus Carols' Bishop and Rask.  Luongo had 2 wins and a .953% SV%

Duchene tallied 4 goals for the Krampus Carols

AshBusters vs. Assassins 4-1-1
The AshBusters cut the Krampus Carols 6 point lead last week in half to 3 points.  Would have been just 2 points had they held onto their lead in assist but the Assassins had a 5 assist day on Sunday, including 3 assists from Backstrom.  The story of the game was the AshBuster's Ovechkin who scored 5 goals and Panarin had 4 goals.  That alone would have been enough to beat the Assassins in goals.  Plus the AshBusters goalies were impressive too as Holtby, who has been hot this year, had 3 wins and .932 while Dubnyk had 2 wins and .931. 

Ovechkin celebrated a 5 goal week!!

CFHL Week 10

Week 10 of the CFHL was a week of blow outs!  Take a look

Goon Crew vs. Krampus Carols 5-1
This was suppose to be the match up of the week between the top two teams in the CFHL.  It looked like it was going to be worse than it actually was until Saturday where the Krampus scored 5 goals, including 2 from Crosby who had been quiet as of late.  He ended up with 4 goals for the week.  Krampus ended up winning goals 12-10.  The rest of the categories belonged to the Crew thanks to a Sunday shut out by Crawford to win both the Wins and SV%.  Spezza had 5 assists for the Crew to earn Number One star of the game.  Both teams remain in first place in their respective divisions, but he lead the Krampus Carols had has been cut to only 6 points.

Spezza tallied 5 assists for the Crew

AshBusters vs. USSR 5-1
That 6 point lead the Krampus hold is over the suddenly surging AshBusters.  They handed the USSR an ass kicking.  They have gone 6-0, 2-3 and 5-1 last three weeks.  AshBusters did it in pretty impressive fashion taking goals 16-8 and Assist 15-11 and the +/- woes of the Soviets continued as they lost that category -13 to +9.  So how did the AshBusters do this?  Well Patrick Sharp scored 3 goals and Ovechkin added 4 more.  Three players had 3 assist each ("Delta Bravo" Subban, Ekman-Larsson "Overdrive", and "Cousin" Keith). Patrick Kane did what he could for the Red Army, scoring 2 goals, 5 assists and a +3.  Give this guy some help!!

Ovechkin loves to stick it to his home country!

Who Gives a Puck vs. Assassins 4-2
The defending champs, clearly suffering from Cherry Cup hang over, finally got a winning week, their first one since Week 2.  It wasn't easy, in fact it might have not been a victory had it not been for the Assassins disastrous Sunday where they went a -4 and lost the +/- category.  Had that not happen this game would have been 3-3.  MacKinnon led all players with 3 goals and while Little for the Puck had 4 assists, Klingberg for the Assassins had 5 to help them claim Assists.  The Puck have a real problem between the pipes right now as they currently only have one healthy goalie, as 3 goalies for the Puck are on IR (Kemper, Miller and Bobrovsky). 

MacKinnon celebrates one of his 3 goals

Checkers vs. Mayhem on Ice 6-0
This was the blow out of the week.  Not only was the final score 6-0 but every category was a blow out.  Checkers beat them by 4 goals, 12 assists, a +25, 18 PIM, 3 wins and a .050 SV%.  It doesn't hurt when you start a week like the Checkers did.  On Monday they posted 5 goals, 8 assists, a +12 and 4 PIM, and they never looked back from there.  This was in large part to the Kings who won 5-0 and Checker center Toffoli had a hat trick and the Zombie Kopitar had 4 assists.  Jonathan Quick was the Number One Star of the game and the entire league, going 4-0 and posting a SV% of .968!


King was a wall this week

Fantasy Bowl XXXI

Fantasy Bowl XXXI:  Cabucki Crush 28 Jakes' Juggernauts 26

In the 31st edition of the Cherry Fantasy Football League's Fantasy Bowl the Crush came from behind in dramatic fashion to defeat the Juggernauts to capture their 2nd Fantasy Bowl title.

Matthews and Bradford hooked up for 20 points!!

This game looked like the Juggernauts would win their first title in their first trip to the Fantasy Bowl.  It would start with a QB dual between Bradford for the Juggernauts vs. Eli "Mouth Breather" Manning.  They would equal in TDs at 2 a piece, each scoring 8 points.  The difference however was that Bradford's 2 TDs went to fellow Juggernaut WR Jordan Matthews for 2 huge 10 point connections!!  Hightower would add another TD  for the Juggernauts. As did McFadden, well at least it looked like it but he fumbled the ball on the one and it went out of the end zone, thus becoming the Crush's ball.   At the "half"( after the 1 o'clock games) it was 26-8.  The Juggernauts looked like they were in command of this game and it would appear that the Crush would be facing back to back losses in the Fantasy Bowl. 


Crush D strip McFadden just before he scored...

The game would turn out to be a tale of two halves as the Crush began to chip away sat the Juggs lead.  Gates would perform an amazing one handed catch for a TD to make the game 26-14, bringing the Crush within striking distance.  The Kicker dual would be between Catanzaro vs. Gano for the Crush.  Catanzaro, apparently overcome with Fantasy Bowl jitters missed an XP, and a FG and ended with a big fat ZERO.  On the other hand Gano would kick in 8 big points making the score 26-22.  TE for the Juggs, Olsen would also disappoint not scoring at all. 

Gates scores a one handed TD for the Crush!

It was the final game of the season as the Vikings and Packers squared off, the Crush's only hope was to have Richard Rodgers catch a TD.  One quarter would go by and nothing.  Second Quarter, still nothing.  3rd quarter... nothing yet.  Not to mention the Packers really looked like they would not be throwing any TD passes.  Well by the 4th quarter Rodgers would catch a pass in the flat and rumble to the end zone leaping for the goal line and barely breaking the plane for the TD!  The officials would review it and the call stands TD FOR THE CRUSH! Game over!  Crush are the Fantasy Bowl XXXI Champions!


Apparently this was a TD, game winning TD!

A couple of keys to this game was the move to bench Bortles in favor of Manning by the Crush.  Bortles had been red hot lately, but the Crush gambled on Manning who was in a more favorable match up.  Bortles ended up being shut out, so the move was the right one, otherwise they would have lost 26-20.


Manning raises the Cherry Trophy for FB XXXI

Another key to the game was out of the control of the Juggernauts.  If either McFadden had held onto the ball and not fumbled for the TD, 32-28 Juggernauts.  Or if Catanzaro could have made his FG, 29-28 Juggernauts.  But as fate would have it, it would be the Crush that would become victorious.  As it was the Redskins (Crush D) were the ones that knocked that ball out of McFadden's hands for the turnover.

Congratulations to the Cabucki's Crush on their second Fantasy Bowl Title!

 

CFFL Playoffs

Well Fantasy Bowl XXXI is set!  The Juggernauts will face the Crush in the 31st edition of the Cherry Fantasy Football Fantasy Bowl.  Here's how they got there:

Cabucki's Crush 48 Stamm's Sinistars 28
The Sinistars were looking for more magic out of their little elf Woodhead, who scored 4 times last week.  But unfortunately he must have been tied up making sure Santa made all his deliveries on Christmas Eve because he didn't score once that night.  Neither did Amari Cooper, who wasn't in the line up last week and scored.  This week he is in and doesn't score.  By the end of the first quarter (or the Thursday and Saturday Games) it was 6-6.

Woodhead was too busy being on the shelf

Williams scores one of his two TDs!

The Sinistars would take an early lead with a TD pass to Maclin to make the score 12-7.  However that would really be it for the Sinistars as the Crush began to pour it on.  First it was a TD from Williams to make it 16-12 and then he would score again.  As did Gillislee...who?  Gillislee!  The Crush would get 18 points from their stable of back up running backs.  On the bench was Frank Gore's "Knee" who scored 2 times as well.  There was no shortage of running backs for the Crush this week.

To make matters worse for the Sinistars, The Crush started Blake Bortles while the Sinistars had one of the Allen Brothers...Robinson.  Bortles would end up with 17 big points while Robinson would only benefit from one of the QB's TD passes.  The Crush return to the Fantasy Bowl for the 2nd year in a row.  Last year they squeaked into the playoffs and made it all the way to Fantasy Bowl XXX only to lose to the Chislers 30-13.

Bortles girlfriend, ex? who cares....Lindsey Duke

 Jakes' Juggernauts 42 Mark's Mafia 12
The Juggernauts, after playing second fiddle to the Krauts for years, finally have made it to the Fantasy Bowl and it wasn't very difficult what so ever as this game was never close.  The Juggs, not wanting to miss up on a 10 point connection again, decided to start both Bradford and Matthews this week (last week he did not).  They would hook up for another 10 point connection this week.  Unfortunately it would be their only one.

Bradford hits Matthews for the 10 point connection

Not to fear, the suddenly deadly dual Saints attack of Hightower and Cooks would score 18 points between them.  Add in a Kelce TD and 8 points from kicker Catanzaro "Cantstandya" and this game was a cinch.  It didn't hurt that the Mafia decided to bench the red hot Kirk Cousins, who broke the post season  game for most points by a QB just last week.  He would throw for 17 points this week compared to Roethlisberger's big fat ZERO!  Well in the scheme of things, it didn't really matter because even if he started him they still would have lost.

Hightower and Cooks been on fire!

Fantasy Bowl XXI:  Jakes' Juggernauts at Cabucki's Crush

This is the third trip to the Fantasy Bowl for the Crush and their second trip in a row.  A win will give them 2 Fantasy Bowl Trophies and tie for third most titles in the history of the CFFL.  (Crickets, Jewels, Maulers, Power, Mooches and Krauts).  This is the first trip to the Fantasy Bowl for the Juggernauts and want to put the critics that were critical on draft day to rest.  Lets see how they match up.

Quarterback: Juggernauts' Bradford vs. Crush's Bortles
This is assuming that the Juggs go with Bradford.  This is probably going to be the play since McCarron injured his hand on the final play of last weeks game.  Either way the nod has to go with Bortles who has been lights out lately (thanks to the Allen Brothers).  Since week 13 Bortels has scored 20, 18, 10, and 17 points.
Advantage: Crush

More of Lindsey Duke...hell with Blake...

Running Backs: Juggernauts' Hightower vs. Crush's Gillislee, Williams, Gore
Hightower has been a great pick up for the Juggs and has been playing well, scoring 3 TDs in the past 3 weeks.  Interestingly the Juggs have Le'Veon Bell who is out for the season, and the Crush have his back up DeAngelo Williams.  Williams has filled in nicely in place of Bell and has 11 TDs on the season, 5 coming in the past 3 weeks.  The second back for the Crush is still to be determined.  Will they ride the unknown Gillislee or take the Veteran Gore?  Flip a coin.  I don't see either of them scoring this week, however Williams should be enough
Advantage: Crush

Williams leads the Crush rushing attack

Wide Receivers and Tight Ends:  Juggs' Cooks, Matthews, Kelce, Olsen, Seferian-Jenkins vs. Crush's Gates, Rodgers, Willson? Jeffery? Wright? Royal?
The Crush have a lot of questions for their wide outs.  Jeffery will likely not play once again.  Willson suffered a concussion (bounty) vs. Rams last week and so he is in the dreaded concussion protocol.  On the bench for the Crush is Eddie Royal, who has 1 TD catch all year, back in Week 4, and Kendall Wright, who hasn't caught a TD pass since Week 7.

The Juggs seem a little more solid in this area with strong set of TEs in Kelce and Olsen not to mention Seferian-Jenkins (16 TDs between them).  Cooks has been on fire lately scoing in each of the last 2 games and now has 9 TDs on the season.  So has Matthews, who gives them a nice 10 point connection if they go with Bradford.
Advantage: Juggernauts

Kelce and Olsen, key to a Juggs victory

Kickers:  Juggeranuts' Catanzaro vs. Crush's Gano

Redskin Defense Cheerleader...

Both kickers have scored a lot of points and playing for teams that tend to drive the ball and put up points.  Catanzaro has 137 points on year and Gano 138.  Close as it gets.
Advantage: Draw.

Defense: Juggernauts' Panthers vs. Crush's Redskins
Another close one.  I am leaning toward the Panthers as they play the Buccaneers as they tend to turn the ball over for 6 points.  If any of them will score my money would be on the Panther D.  However any score from either of these defenses would be a bonus and give the team that scored a huge leg up on winning Fantasy Bowl XXXI

Prediction:  Crush 32  Juggernauts 30

This should be a close one.  While the Crush will dominate the running game the Juggernauts will dominate the receiving game.  The difference will come at QB where Bortels out duels Bradford 12-4  and the Crush get their 2nd Fantasy Bowl Title!!

Crush Cheerleader!

CFHL Week 9

Almost the New Year.  It all begins with the Winter Classic between the Goon Crew and Krampus Carols, the two top teams in the CFHL.  However, I digress.  Here is what happen this past week in the CFHL.

Goon Crew vs. AshBusters 3-2-1
The Goon Crew kept up with their winning ways but it wasn't easy.  The AshBusters gave them a fight and nearly came away with the tie but a 5 goal performance on Sunday kept that from happening.    The Crew continue to ride their Stars line of Spezza, Benn and Seguin.  (4 goals, 6 assists, +8 and 6 PIM combined).  Throw in the AshBusters' center Sharp and that would add 2 more goals, 4 assists and a +2 to all the Stars that played in this match up.  Goalies were a disappointment on both sides as they could only manage a win a piece.

Stars have been red hot!

USSR vs. Assassins 3-2-1
Another close match up had the Soviets taking out the Assassins and pushing them to last place in the CFHL.  It wasn't pretty as the USSR could only manage 4 goals to the Assassins 6 and both teams tied with only 6 assists.   Mark Stone lead all players with 3 goals for the Assassins.  Oh and the +/- battle was won by the USSR -7 to -8...brutal.  At least the goalies played better as the USSR edged the Assassins in SV% .939 to .932, while the Assassins got 3 wins between Allen and Rinne.

Rinne making save for Assassins

Checkers vs. Who Gives a Puck 3-2-1
As if the USSR's goal total of 4 wasn't bad enough, the Puck scored only 3 times, 2 from Brent Burns.  Malkin and Kessel teamed up for 4 goals for the Checkers as they basically have players from just 3 teams (Kings, Predators, and Penguins).  Muzzin for the Checkers was the Goon of the game racking up a 10 minute misconduct penalty.  Antti Niemi was the Number One Star of the game getting 2 wins and a SV% of .966 including a shut out.  The Puck could be suffering from the Cherry Cup hangover.  This week they  had only one player on the plus side of the +/-.

Niemi came up big for Checkers

Mayhem on Ice vs. Krampus Carols 3-3
In what is becoming one of the most storied rivalries (Mayhem vs. Krampus and Dragons), the two hockey clubs skated to a 3-3 tie.  Even though it was Christmas time, someone didn't tell Scott Hartnell of the Mayhem as he tallied 21 PIM by getting a charging major against Krampus goalie Ben Bishop that ultimately lead to a game misconduct.  Corey Perry's 2 goals on Sunday Night helped the Krampus pass the Mayhem in Goals to force the tie.  This all while apparently the two owners were seen together sliding down water slides at some random water park...bitter rivals?  Apparently not.

Hartnell plowing over Bishop