CFHL Week 3 - Hockey Wife Edition

 Week 3 action on the ice...

The Goon Crew move into first place after the 4-2 victory over the Krampus Carols.  Goal tending was key as they got 3 wins and a .903 from "King of the" Hill and Oettinger.  Tom Wilson continues his stellar play with 3 goals and 9 hits!

Taylor Pischke Tom Wilson's wife and
Canadian Volleyball star

The Slapshots took down Who Gives a Puck 3-2-1.  Dahlin had 3 helpers , 2 PPP and 3 hits from the blue line for the Slapshots.  Vincent Trocheck for the Puck had a huge week in the loss scoring 3 times, 2 assists, 3 PPP and 8 hits!

Hillary Trocheck, Vincent's wife

The defending champs go down to the Assassins 3-2-1 as well. They managed to only score 2 goals the entire week.  J. T. Miller led the Assassins with 2 goals, 2 helpers and 12 hits!

California Raisins had a good week beating the Space Monkey Mafia 4-1-1 behind a big week from Konecny.  He had 2 goals, 5 assists and 6 hits!  Both teams did well between the pipes tying with 3 wins and the Mafia had .964 SV%. (Blackwood and Sorokin)

Checkers continue to struggle some to start the year, this week skating to a 3-3 tie with the White Mambas.  They lost all offensive categories but then won both goalie and hits of course.  The Checkers goalies were stellar getting 4 wins and .941% between  Hellebuyck and Vasilevskiy.  

Goalie of the Week:  Connor Hellebuyck, Checkers - 2 wins, .960 SV%

Connor Hellebuyck and wife Andrea

Goon of the Week:  Nikita Zadorov, D, Checkers - 16 hits

Alexsandra Zadorov, Nikita's wife 
(oh those Russians...)

Skater of the Week:  Travis Konecny, F, Raisins - 2 goals, 5 assists, 2 PPP, 6 hits

Karly Konecny, Travis' wife

CFFL40 Memorial Cup and Awards

The season is complete.  The Krauts earned their 4th title and the Memorial Cup was won by the Great White North.  Winter is truly coming!

The Memorial Cup, honoring franchise owners that have passed on, is a free for all with the most points earned by a division winning the Cup.  Plus the most points by a team earns a free entry next year.  

 Honoring:

Jennifer Cherry - Jennifer's Jewels

Steve Machcinski - Steve's Stooges

Burt Carlson - Bacardi's Bums

Rich Johnston - Russian Roulette

Memorial Cup Results:

1. North - 146 points

    Wrecking Crew - 58 (where was this all year...?)

Geno Smith scored 16 points for the Crew in 
Memorial Cup

    Ferrets - 33

    Animals - 32

    Chislers - 23

2. East - 117 points

    Krauts - 44

    Cocktails - 32

    Sinistars - 23

    Juggernauts - 18

3. South - 115 points

    Killer Bees - 45

    Dragons - 28

    Warbirds - 24

    Titans - 24

4. West - 99 points

    Legion - 33

    Crush - 30

    Whales - 21

    Killers - 15

CFFL Awards

2024 CFFL MVP - Josh Allen, QB, Chilsers - 191 points 

(runner up was Lamar Jackson with 190 points!)

Josh Allen becomes the first ever back to back MVP in the CFFL!  This is his third MVP and trails only Aaron Rodgers' 4 MVPs.  Players with 2: Manning, Favre, Mahomes, Brady, and Brees.

All CFFL Team

QB - Josh Allen, Chislers - 191

RB  - Jahmyr Gibbs, Ferrets - 108

RB - James Cook, Chislers - 102

WR - Ja'Marr Chase, Chislers - 102

WR - Terry McLaurin, Killers - 78

K - Chris Boswell, Ferrets - 158

DEF - Broncos, Bees - 40

Gibbs finshed the season with 24 points in the Memorial Cup!

All CFFL Nickname Team

QB - Sam "Blockhead, I'm seeing ghost" Darnold, Legion

RB - Josh Jacobs "Jingleheimerschmidt", Legion

RB - Zach Charbonnet "I like Charbonnet", Animals

WR - Terry "Midichlorian" McLaurin, Killers

WR - Tee "Mrs. Sue" Higgins, Wrecking Crew

WR - Jalen McMillian "and Wife", Killers

WR - Alec "Hawkeye" Pierce, Warbirds

K - Jake "Master" Bates, Juggs

showing our age:

Mrs. Sue Wiggins (Tee Higgins)

Jalen McMillan "and Wife"

Alec "Hawkeye" Pierce

What a 40th year in the CFFL that started in Fabulous Las Vegas for the Draft!  If it was up to me we would have the draft in Vegas every year!  But I would settle for every other year...Just sayin...

CFHL Week 2

 Week 2 Action...

Goon Crew get a better showing this week against the Assassins winning 4-2 despite Assassins' forward Pastrnak's 4 goals.  Tom Wilson led the way for the Crew with 2 goals, 3 assists and 9 hits and they were strong in the net between "King of the" Hill and Jake "the snake" Oettinger. 

Slapshots and Raisins skated to a 3-3 tie, second tie for the Slapshots.  Slapshot netminder Darcy Kuemper had two wins with 1 shutout and a .985 SV% in the win.  Slapshots also got 24 assists, 5 from Mitch Marner!

Checkers brought the heat on the boards after losing last week to hits, by getting 55 hits this week!  Unfortunately for them that was the only category they would win against the Space Monkey Mafia.  

The White Mambas came down to earth as they faced the defending cup champs Greek Empire.  The Empire prevailed 4-2 in a game that only saw 1 goalie win between the two teams.  ("What about" Bobrovsky had the one win for the Empire)

And finally the Krampus Carols get the win against Who Gives a Puck 3-2-1 in a tight one.  While the Mambas and Empire had no goaltending, this game had all goal tending with both teams notching 3 wins each, with the Krampus beating the Puck in SV% .946 vs .937! 

Goalie of the Week:  Darcy Kuemper, Slapshots, 2 wins .985 SV%

Goon of the Week:  Will Cuylle, F, Checkers, 17 hits

Skater of the Week:  Alex DeBrincat, F, Raisins, 2 goals, 3 assists, 3 PPP, 2 hits

CFHL Week 1

 

The puck as dropped on another Cherry Fantasy Hockey League as the Greek Empire begin their defense of their first every Cherry Cup!  Speaking of which they would skate to a 3-3 tie with the Space Monkey Mafia led by Sabastian Aho "A-hole" who had 2 goals and 10 hits.

Aho the A-hole

In other games, the Crew were able to at least salvage a 2-3-1 week against the White Mamba who appeared "clueless" at the draft, but was it all an act?  Jeremy Swayman "Dayman" in net for the Mamba had 2 wins and an impressive .966 SV%

Slapshots and Checkers skated to a 3-3 tie.  Surprisingly the Checkers lost to the Slapshots in hits.  Checkers will be looking to add more goons to their starting lineup to make up for last week.  Slapshot Sabers Thompson and Dahlin combined for 2 goals, 9 assists, 3 PPP and 10 hits!

Thompson had a good week for the Slapshots

Who Gives a Puck was able to hand the Raisins a big loss 5-0-1 and the Krampus Carols and Assassins tied 3-3.

Goalie of the Week:  Jeremey Swayman, White Mamba - 2 wins, .966 SV%

Goon of the Week:  Andrei Svechnikov, F, White Mambas - 12 hits

Player of the Week:  Mitch Marner, F, Slapshots 3goals, 2 assists, 2 PPP, 2 Hits

CFFL40 Fantasy Bowl XL

 FANTASY BOWL XL

Kretz Krauts 53  Alex Animals 21

Berlin, Germany - Well this Fantasy Bowl was reminiscent of the Super Bowls of the Late 80s and early 90s....Not even close.  The Krauts opened up a 29-6 lead early and never looked back.  Mahomes threw for 3 TDs including one to Xavier Worthy for a 10 point connection.

The Animals still had Kyler Murray early to try to get back into the game, but he would only score 4 points on Saturday Night making the game 29-10.  Earlier Charbonnet "I like Charbonnet" would play in a 6-3 brutal game, getting zero points.  Then news came in that CeeDee Lamb would not be playing.  Things were looking pretty grim for the Animals. 

The Kraut Blitzkrieg would continue with the game pretty much over.  They would get 12 more points from Bijan Robinson.  Then on the final game, Jameson Williams scores two more times.  "No Mas!" cried the Animals.

The Krauts win their 4th title moving into second place for most titles of all time, behind only the Chislers' 7 titles.  The Krauts strength all season was their running game of Henry and Robinson (24 points in final two playoff games).  Add Mahomes and some pretty talented WRs (Adams, Worthy and Williams) and this team was pretty much unstoppable.

Fantasy Bowl XL MVP - Patrick Mahomes - 12 points and a 10 point connection 

Playoff MVP - Patrick Mahomes - 30 points

The Krauts set things in motion back in August in Vegas

4 trophies for the Krauts!

Kraut Fantasy Bowl Victory Parade

CFFL40 Playoffs Round 2 and FB XL Preview

 What a semifinal round!  Two close games!  One coming down to a final kick!

Krauts 43  Cheislers 40

It didn't look good for the Chislers most of the game.  The Krauts came rumbling down the streets in their Panzer tanks and blitzkrieged the Chislers.  Mahomes had 10 points followed by 12 big points from Bijian Robinson.  In fact almost all of his players scored, getting TDs from Adams and Williams.  Before you knew it, it was 43-18. 

But not to fear, the Chislers had Superman Josh Allen.  The past two weeks Allen scored 20, 30, and 20 points!  However this week he would struggle getting only 4 points.  However one of his passes went to James Cook for a big sideways 10-point connection!  Smith-Njigba would score late and suddenly they were only down 4 points!  Could Allen throw one more?  He heaved it into the end zone, but the receiver dropped the potential game winning score.  

The Chislers quest for Number 8 will have to wait another year.  The Krauts move on to play in their 4th Fantasy Bowl and looking to go 4-0 in the title game.

Animals 32  Warbirds 31

The Warbirds started out pretty strong getting 12 points from Joe Burrow plus a TD from Brian Thomas Jr.  The Animals countered with 10 points from Kyler Murray and a TD from "Flying" St. Brown.  But after a 50 yard TD run by Achane and 7 points from their kicker Carlson (he also missed a FG) the Warbirds led 31-22.  

The Animals were not dead yet with "A, B,"CeeDee Lamb left Sunday night and their kicker Monday night.  CeeDee Lamb caught a bomb and appeared to score, but was actually down just short.  The remainder of the game Lamb would not find the end zone.  So the Warbirds still held onto the 9 point lead.  Animals kicker Brandon McManus started kicking XPs.  One, two, three. Then a FG.  Score was now 31-28.  It was squeaky bum time for the Warbirds.  Then late in the 4th McManus kicked a 46 yarder to tie the game!  Then with just over two minutes left he would kick the game winning XP!  

With the Animals making it to the Fantasy Bowl, both top seeds will face off in Fantasy Bowl XL.  This is the Animals 4th trip to the Fantasy Bowl as well, looking to earn their 3rd title.  

1st Round Pick Tourney:

Crush 25  Wrecking Crew 22

Legion 42  Sinistars 21

Crush play Legion for the Number 1 pick in next years draft.

Fantasy Bowl XL

So here we are.  The 40th Fantasy Bowl in history of the Cherry Fantasy Football League.  The Animals will fly to Berlin to take on the top seeded Krauts.

Past Fantasy Bowls:

Fantasy Bowl I:  Crickets 34 Scumbags 11

Fantasy Bowl II:  Stooges 17  Maulers 9

Fantasy Bowl III: Jewels 35  Bums 29

Fantasy Bowl IV: Astronomicals 40  Jewels 17

Fantasy Bowl V:  Mooches 38  Maulers 27

Fantasy Bowl VI: Mooches 14 Twins 2

Fantasy Bowl VII: Wrecking Crew 32  Jewels 16

Fantasy Bowl VIII: Jewels 36  Whammers 23

Fantasy Bowl IX:  Maulers 42  Power 40

Fantasy Bowl X: Geriatrics 26  Mooches 16

Fantasy Bowl XI:  Chislers 42 Twins 29

Fantasy Bowl XII:  Bombers 34  Twins 20

Fantasy Bowl XIII: Twins 17  Apes 7

Fantasy Bowl XIV: Maulers 43  Chislers 27

Fantasy Bowl XV: Power 31  Chislers 26

Fantasy Bowl XVI: Power 45  Twins 34

Fantasy Bowl XVII: Crickets 26  Bums 12

Fantasy Bowl XVIII: Bees 24  Chislers 23

Fantasy Bowl  XVIV: Wrecking Crew 36  Chislers 33

Fantasy Bowl XX:  Mafia 28 Crickets 27

Fantasy Bowl XXI: Chislers 41  Strikers 26

Fantasy Bowl XXII: Crush 41 Wrecking Crew 37

Fantasy Bowl XXIII: Krauts 38  Ferrets 28

Fantasy Bowl XXIV: Yard Dogs 32  Chislers 30

Fantasy Bowl XXV: Krauts 38  Wrecking Crew 23

Fantasy Bowl XXVI: Mayhem 22 Mafia 19

Fantasy Bowl XXVII: Chislers 55  Wrecking Crew 39

Fantasy Bowl XXVIII: Chislers 32 Bees 25

Fantasy Bowl XXIX:  Wrecking Crew 35  Bums 23

Fantasy Bowl XXX:  Chislers 30  Crush 13

Fantasy Bowl XXXI: Crush 28  Juggernauts 26

Fantasy Bowl XXXII: Mayhem 46 Mafia 42

Fantasy Bowl XXXIII: Animals 28  Killers 21

Fantasy Bowl XXXIV: Chislers 46 Cocktails 31

Fantasy Bowl XXXV: Sinistars 34  Cocktails 18

Fantasy Bowl XXXVI: Chislers 69  Dragons 28

Fantasy Bowl XXXVII: Krauts 51  Animals 22

Fantasy Bowl XXXVIII: Whales 39  Crush 23

Fantasy Bowl XXXIX: Animals 58  Sinistars 32

Fantasy Bowl XL Preview:  Alex's Animals (-4) at Kretz Krauts

Weather shouldn't be a factor in Berlin for Fantasy Bowl XL with temperatures in the low 40s with little chance of precipitation.   So let's take a look at this match up.

QB:  Animals' Kyler Murray vs. Krauts' Patrick Mahomes.

Clearly the advantage goes to the Krauts Mahomes.  Murray can certain put up comparable points, but you can't go against Mahomes.

Advantage: Krauts

RB:  Animals' Joe Mixon and Tyrone Tracy vs. Krauts' Derrick Henry and Bijan Robinson.

Pretty good match up between RBs here.  Mixon has 72 points on the year, but has only 1 score in the past 5 weeks.  Tracy has been a surprise getting 3 scores in past 4 weeks.  Henry similar to Mixon as he has 90 points but hasn't scored a TD since week 11.  Robinson has been lighting it up though for the Krauts.

Advantage: Krauts

WR:  Animals' Lamb, St. Brown, and Andrews vs. Krauts' Adams, Williams and Worthy.

Another close one.  Veterans Lamb and Adams pretty much a wash.  Then you have St. Brown and Williams both for the Lions.  Both pretty even.  Andrews has scored in 4 straight games.  Worthy is a dangerous 10 point connection.

Advantage:  Even

Special Teams and Defense:  Animals' McManus and Bengals vs. Krauts' Butker and 49ers.

Another hard call here.  McManus was the hero for the Animals last week.  Butker is back from being on IR and Christmas could be a big day for the Krauts with the Chiefs playing...

Prediction:  I would take the points and the Krauts.  Krauts could win outright in a tough match up of top seeds in Fantasy Bowl XL!  Krauts 38 Animals 36

Merry Christmas!!

CFFL40 Playoffs

 There was a glitch in the Matrix causing the Bees to actually make the playoffs not the Legion...Krauts were thankful for that glitch...

Playoffs Round 1:

Krauts 35  Bees 23

The Bees certainly tried to take advantage of getting in the playoffs and gave the Krauts a game.  After Davante Adams scored 14 points, the Krauts only led 28-23 going into the Monday double header.  Bees had Jordan Addison "Not Mattison" but the Krauts had Bijan "Mustard" Robinson and Younghoe "Cream on Sum Yong Guy" Koo.  7 points from Koo eliminated the Bees and the Krauts move on.

Adams scores one of his two TDs

Animals 42  Dragons 38

This was the most exciting playoff game of the week!  Lamar Jackson of the Dragons did all he could to help the Dragons defeat the defending champ Animals by scoring 20 points from 5 TD passes!!  Dragons led 38-36 going into Sunday Night Football and the Animals only had one player left.  But late in the game that player, Charbonnet "I like Charbonnet" would break loose for a 24 yard game winning TD for the Animals! Their title defense continues on.

Charbonnet scores the game winning TD!

Warbirds 24  Cocktails 20 

Sunday Night wasn't as good for the Cocktails however.  They had a chance to beat the Warbirds whose 24 points came from just two players (Burrow and Chase Brown).  He didn't even get a single point from his kicker.  What an opportunity for the Cocktails with Jordan Love, Jayden Reed and Tucker Kraft Sunday night.  Love would throw 2 TD passes but neither of them went to Reed or Kraft.  Just one to either of them and they would have moved on.  

Chase Brown scores twice in the win

Chislers 44  Whales 32

The game wasn't nearly as close as the score indicated.  The Chislers just continue to roll on with Superman Josh Allen,.  This week he scored 20 more points in the win along with 12 points from James Cook.  Last three week point totals for Allen?  20-30-20!!  The Whales would get 12 points late from kicker Will "John Luke" Reichard on Monday night but the game was over by then.

This dude cannot be stopped!

Here are the scores in the #1 Pick in the 2025 Draft Bracket:

Crew 23  Juggernauts 12

Legion 34  Titans 11

Sinistars 38  Killers 32

Crush 58  Ferrets 45

Round 2 Match Ups

Chislers at Krauts (+14) - You have to be kidding me?  The Krauts are a 14 point dog at home in Berlin?  The Chislers do have Superman Allen and Mahomes is banged up for the Krauts. I have a feeling the Kraut ground game will come alive in this one, but Allen will pull some ridiculous point total again.

Take Krauts and the points but Chislers win close one.

Warbirds at Animals (-2) - This would be a stay away game with that short line.  2 points sounds about right between these two.  Warbirds will once again rely on Burrow to deliver a victory, but will Brian Thomas get in the line up?  Animals riding the backs of Charbonnet "I like Charbonnet" and Mixon.

Lay the points.  Looks like we will have a father-son Fantasy Bowl!

#1 Pick in 2025 Draft match ups:

Crush at Wrecking Crew (+4) Lay points with the Crush.  They are hot.  Crew haven't been all year

Sinistars at Legion (-11) Too many points.  Take it with the Sinistars but Legion prevail.