CFHL Week 3

 CFHL Week 3 action..

California Raisins vs. Goon Crew 3-2-2

This was a dog fight all week long and the Raisins were able to finally take the lead on the final day beating the Goon Crew in blocks 40-35.  Both teams tied with 19 assist with Goon Crew forward Pastrnak getting 7, 6 in one game! Celebrini for the Raisins led the way with a 2-5-4-2-4 week and Cuylle had 15 hits!  

Cuylle was dealing out the hits

Krampus Carols vs. Slapshots 4-3

If the Slapshots could get anything out of their goalies of Binnington and Shesterkin, they would have won this game.  However Shesterkin left early with an injury and Binnington gave up 10 goals in two games.  Krampus win despite being out hit 47-9! Panarin led the Krampus with 5 assists as they racked up 25 total helpers for the week! 

Panarin had 5 assists for Krampus!

Space Monkey vs. Checkers 4-3

Checkers almost pulled off this one but fell just one hit and one block short for the week!  Wait what?  The Checkers got out hit??  How is that possible?  Sherwood did get 12 hits for the Checkers, but Brady Tkachuk had 16 plus 2 goals for the Space Monkey.

Assassins vs. Greek Empire 5-2

Assassins get the big win taking both goalie categories and edging them by 1 in PPP.  Mark Stone led the Assassins with a huge week getting 3 goals, 5 assist, 4 PPP!  Plus he had 2 hits and 5 blocks!  Connor McDavid for the Empire had 5 goals in the loss.

Who Gives a Puck vs. White Mambas 5-1-1

The defending champions notch another winning week, aiming for a repeat.  They tied in PPP and Puck was able to beat the Mamba by just one hit.  But the edge in goals was 10-4 and blocks 31-17.  Net minder Joseph Woll for the Puck had a great week getting 2 wins and an impressive .984 SV%

Three Stars of the Week

Number One Star: Mark Stone, F, Assassins - 3 goals, 5 assists, 4 PPP, 2 hits, 5 blocks

Number Two Star:  David Pastrnak, F, Goon Crew - 2 goals, 7 assists, 1 PPP, 3 hits, 2 blocks

Number Three Star:  Macklin Celebrini, C, Raisins - 2 goals, 5 assists, 4 PPP, 2 hits, 4 blocks

Net Minder of the Week:  John Gibson, Goon Crew - 3 wins .955 SV%

Goon of the Week:  Brady Tkachuk, F, Space Monkey 16 hits

Blockhead of the Week:  Darnell Nurse, D, Checkers 14 blocks

Awards and Memorial Cup 2025

 The final edition to the CFFL 2025 Season.  Winter is truly here as the Ferrets win their first ever Fantasy Bowl and the North capture their 3rd straight Memorial Cup!

The Memorial Cup, honoring franchise owners that have passed on, is a free for all with the most points earned by a division winning the Cup.  Plus the most points by a team earns a free entry next year.  

 Honoring:

Jennifer Cherry - Jennifer's Jewels

Steve Machcinski - Steve's Stooges

Burt Carlson - Bacardi's Bums

Rich Johnston - Russian Roulette

Memorial Cup Results: Whales almost pull it out with two Zay Flowers TDs but Animals held on with 12 points from Lamar. 

1. North - 133 points

   Animals - 44

    Wrecking Crew - 35

Lamar wins it for the Animals and the North

    Ferrets - 29

    Chislers - 25

2. East - 90 points

    Sinistars - 31

    Krauts - 26

    Juggernauts - 19

    Cocktails - 14

3. West - 71 points

    Whales - 42

    Killers - 12

    Legion - 11

    Lunatics - 6

4. South - 52 points

    Dragons - 21

    Warbirds - 20

    Dominators - 8

    Bees - 3

CFFL Awards

2025 CFFL MVP - Josh Allen, QB, Chislers - 185 points 

(runner up was Matt Stafford with 184 points!)

Josh Allen becomes the first ever back to back  to BACK MVP in the CFFL!  This is his Fourth MVP and now ties Aaron Rodgers' 4 MVPs. Guess he will be the Number One pick next year.

  Players with 2: Manning, Favre, Mahomes, Brady, and Brees.

All CFFL Team

QB - Josh Allen, Chislers - 185

RB  - Jonathan Taylors, Sinistars - 122

RB - Jahmyr Gibbs, Ferrets - 108

WR - Davante Adams, Sinistars - 84

WR - Tee Higgins, Dragons- 68

TE - Trey McBride, Ferrets - 66

K - Jason Myers, Chislers - 171

DEF - Seahawks, Dominators- 48

Taylor had 5 weeks of 18 or more points!

All CFFL Nickname Team

QB - Jared "You got Goffed" Goff, Killers

RB - Kyle Monangai "With the fungi", Cocktails

RB - Zach Charbonnet "I like Charbonnet", Crew

TE- Jake "Turd" Ferguson, Whales

WR - Greg Dortch "On Golf/Football" Killers

WR - Tetairoa "Territorial"  McMillian "and Wife", Krauts

K - Harrison "Thicker Kicker" Mevis "Bevis", Krauts

Shut up Mevis

That's not my name, Name is Turd Ferguson

See you all in August!

CFHL Week 2

 

Six, Seven, Six, Seven is what the kids say today.  What it means I have no idea, but this week in the CFHL its Four, Three, Four, Three as every game ended 4-3.

Goon Crew vs. Space Monkey 4-3

This game was back and forth and Auston Matthews huge 5 goal performance helped the Space Monkey to keep it close and with all their D players playing Sunday almost caught the Goon Crew in blocks.  Mika Zibanejad had a hat trick during the Winter Classic for the Crew.

White Mambas vs. Assassins 4-3

The Mambas dominated the offensive stats including getting 20 goals!  They had 4 skaters with 4 goals each and Nathan MacKinnon had a monster week going 4-6-3-3-2!  

Slapshots vs. Greek Empire 4-3

Slapshots get back on the winning track behind Ovechkin's 15 hits!  Will that earn him Goon of the Week?  The Greek Empire did have a strong showing in net with Juuse "No Goals" Saros and Dustin Wolf combining for 4 wins.

Krampus vs. California Raisins 4-3

In traditional Krampus fashion they are starting out on the right side of the win column.  They left the game battered and bruised from 50 hits by the Raisins, including 11 from Tom Wilson before his injury.  Montembeault and Vasilevskiy (these are not easy names to type by the way) combined for 4 wins vs. Raisins 0 goalie wins.

Who Gives a Puck vs. Checkers 4-3

Match up between the most winningest franchises in CFHL history the Puck came away with the win.  Again with no help from their net minders posting another goose egg in wins.  Of course the checkers led the way with 57 hits including an absurd about from Kiefer "Sutherland" Sherwood (29!).  Tyler Bertuzzi got a hat trick on Sunday to seal the win in Goals for the Puck.

 Three Stars of the Week:

Number One Star:  Nikita Kucherov, F, Krampus - 3 goals, 7 assists, 5 PPP, 1 hit and 1 block

Number Two Star:  Nathan MacKinnon, C, Mambas - 4 goals, 6 assists, 3 PPP, 3 hit and 3 blocks

Number Three Star:   Auston Matthews, C, Space Money - 5 goals, 1 assist, 1 PPP, 3 blocks

Goon of the Week:  Kiefer "Sutherland" Sherwood "Forest" - 29 hits

Block Head of the Week:  Colton Parayko, D, Goon Crew - 13 blocks

Net Minder of the Week:  Jeremy Swayman "Fighter of the Night Man", G, Checkers - 2 wins, .944 SV%

CFFL Fantasy Bowl XLI

 

FANTASY BOWL XLI

Fez's Ferrets 48 - Stamm's Sinistars 32

The Ferrets did it!  The Ferrets did it!!  For 41 years they have been striving for their first ever Fantasy Bowl and they finally did it!  

The game started out slow and with Gibbs getting shut out on Christmas Day the Ferrets were a little nervous.  RJ Harvey and Jonathan Taylor were able to get TDs for the Sinistars, but then the Ferrets began the onslaught.  

In a bold move, the Ferrets decided to bench long time starter Dak Prescott in favor of Trevor Lawrence, who in the past few weeks have outscored Dak.  This move can be dangerous, for typically when one benches a regular starter for someone who has had  a few good weeks it usually backfires.  But not this time.  Lawrence ran in TWO TDs for the Ferrets while Dak only had 8 points.  

Lawrence running in one of his two TDs!

But the MVP of the game was Ja'Marr Chase.  Chase hadn't scored since Week 7, but the Ferrets kept him in the line up every week.  With the lights shining bright, Chase stepped up and caught two TD passes!  Add in a McBride and Hunter Henry TD and this game was over.  Only a 3 TD performance by Joker Face London would bring the Sinistars the trophy.  London would not score a single point and the Ferrets capture their first championship 48-32!

Chase the Fantasy Bowl MVP

The Ferrets are one of the original 3 franchises that started the CFFL back in 1985, along with the Chislers and Wrecking Crew.  They began as the Wening's Wimps and only posted 4 winning seasons in their first 9 years before changing their name to the Fez's Ferrets.  Things wouldn't get much better and prior to this year they had an overall sub .500 record.  

The Ferrets have been plagued with bad luck drafting top players only to see them get hurt.  In 2023 they drafted Travis Kelce after he had scored 12 TDs the year before.  That year? 5 TDs. They drafted Jonathan Taylor in 2021 after he had scored 20 TDs.  That year?  4 TDs and an injury riddled season.  They drafted Derrick Henry in 2021.  He did score 10 TDs first 7 weeks of the season!  But then went on IR rest of the season.  In 2017, maybe one of the most devastating draft picks, the Ferrets drafted David Johnson the year after he scored 20 TDs.  He would blow out his knee in the very first game!  I could go on and on.

But alas, the Ferrets are now on top of the Fantasy Football world as World Champions of the Cherry Fantasy Football League!  Congratulations!

Ferret fans flood the streets in celebraion!

CFHL Week 1 2025-26

The puck has dropped on another season of the CFHL!  

Krampus vs. Goon Crew 4-2-1

The Krampus always start the season out on fire, with it being Krampus season.  Taking down the Goon Crew thanks to Kucherov's 4 goals and Vasilevskiy's 2 wins and SV% of .940!

Greek Empire vs Raisins 4-3

The battle of California to start the season saw the Greek Empire coming out on top of a close one.  They beat the Raisins by only one hit, but dominated Assists 19-5 led by McDavid's 5 helpers.

Assassins vs. Checkers 6-1

The Checkers are going to need some offensive help, as they only had 3 goals, assists and PPP.  No surprise that Draisaitl led the Assassins with 3 goals and 4 PPPs.

White Mambas vs. Slapshots 4-3

Another team that starts out fast, the Mambas, doing it again beating the Slapshots.  It was close, with Mamba winning goals, assists and PPP while Slapshots got hits, blocks (by1) and goalie wins.  Sam Reinhart had 4 assists for the Mambas

Who Gives a Puck vs. Space Monkey 4-1-2

The defending champs are out of the gates in the win column despite no goalie stats.  Bertuzzi was a nice surprise getting 3 goals and 4 hits.  

3 Stars of the Week:

Number 1 Star:  Nikita Kucherov, F, Krampus - 4g, 2a, 2PPP, 3 hits

Number 2 Star:  Eeli Tolvanen, F, Greek Empire - 2g, 4a, 8hits, 2 blocks

Number 3 Star: Matthew Knies, F, Goon Crew - 3g, 2a, 2PPP, 6 hits, 1 block

Goon of the Week:  Kiefer "Sutherland" Sherwood, F, Checkers - 16 hits